In the past week, all our lives have changed so quickly. With the outbreak of the Covid – 19 in the US, we have found ourselves in social distancing and some even quarantined. With uncertainty brings anxiety. And if we adults are feeling anxious, imagine what our kids are feeling!
Over the years I have had to deal with anxiety first hand. Not only do I suffer from anxiety (I truly believe it’s a mom thing! Here’s your new baby, oh and a whole heaping bag of anxiety for the next 18+ years). But my youngest daughter was diagnosed in second grade with social and school anxiety. This diagnosis came after years of dealing with it undiagnosed.
Once we got the diagnosis of anxiety and saw a therapist we learned to deal with this issue without medication. It was hard, but I had been doing it for years with her undiagnosed so I choose to continue. During this time I really learned what worked and what made the situation harder.
I feel as a parent, going through this new uncharted territory, we ourselves are anxious and have no answers. The 5 tips can not only help our kids through this time but ourselves as well.
Be Honest
I have found that being honest with our kids is the best way. They are going to have a ton of questions and emotions. Answer the questions the best you can. Don’t hide the truth from them, but don’t give them adult answers either. If you yourself are feeling anxious, upset or even frustrated with the situation, tell them that. Work together to get through your emotions. Kids who know that they aren’t alone, or that an adult feels the same way gives them comfort.
It’s a good idea to keep an emotion journal. Start the day by writing down your emotions and working through them. Have your kids do the same and take some time to talk about them together. For littler kids who can’t write, they can draw pictures to express their feelings. Do this throughout the day, but especially at night. That way, you can see if they (and yourself) are getting any relief. Talking about your feelings gets them off your chest, and kids find comfort in knowing that they aren’t alone.
Don’t watch the news
Hopefully, if you have anxious feelings you are already doing this. In our house, we stopped watching the news years ago. Every day I read headlines on my phone via CNN and PBS. I haven’t missed anything major in the world, yet I have relieved a lot of stress in my life and my kids.
The job of the news is to inform us; however, it’s also to keep us engaged. To do this they tend to stretch the truth, make this worse or scare us so we continue to tune in. They don’t relate stories to our kids, which means the stories they are listening to are adult stories that are going to scare them.
Turn off the tv with the kids around. Talk about current events around the dinner table in normal, unscary terms. But keep the news off and you will be less anxious in the long run.
Find a relaxing activity
When my daughter starts to have an anxiety attack we have a list of things that calms her down. Her favorite is a nice relaxing, lavender-scented bath. She loves just sitting in there, thinking about nothing and the lavender oil brings her additional calmness. When she was younger I would pull out the Play-doh and let her play with it. It kept her mind off of her anxiety and she took her stress out on the Play-doh (she didn’t realize what she was doing but I knew!).
Maybe laying and cuddling on the couch watching a movie together, having a dance party in the kitchen to your favorite songs, or eating a bowl on icecream is more your style. Whatever it is, find what works for you and your kids.
We use essential oils in our house every day. I diffuse them to relax us, release our feelings of anxiousness and help our days run smoother. You can learn more here about how we use them in our house if this interests you.
Go to scripture
All around our house you will find scriptures posted. Whether on a chalkboard wall, a painting or print, or a post-it note we have them everywhere. I believe scriptures can bring us comfort in time of anxiousness and uncertainty. I use to send my daughter off to school each day with a new verse or one that I knew brought her comfort.
I have compiled a list of verses I have found to be helpful during times of anxiety. Feel free to print them out, share them or refer back to them when you need them. I’ve also compiled a few quotes that I love that can bring comfort too.
Scriptures can bring anyone of any age comfort. Break down the verse for younger kids, but continually remind them that God loves them and will always take care of them! Even the simplest idea of love and comfort can bring anyone of any age easement during times of distress.
If you are looking for a devotional to do during this time I have come up with a great one. This devotional only takes about 2 minutes each day and is appropriate for teens and adults. You can find it here along with more information about it.
If you love fighting anxiety and depression with scripture, I have an amazing scripture writing devotion perfect for you. I’ve always believed scripture writing helps strengthen and grow our relationship with Christ. You can find the 30 day download plan here, or purchase the actual book here.
Pray
This one is probably my favorite. I taught my daughter when she was younger to close her eyes wherever she was and pray. That God would hear her and bring her some comfort during her attack. Throughout the years, she continues to do this. I think this the most important way to deal with your anxiety and feelings of discomfort and uneasiness.
Living with and learning to deal with life with anxiety is hard. There’s no one answer that fits everyone. Each person has to find what works for them. Make sure you are surrounding yourself with positivity, no one or anything that will bring you more anxiety or stress.
Life is beautiful, even during times of uncertainty and stress. Enjoy the ride, enjoy the time now with your family and slow down. You will, along with everyone, will get through this!
