It’s time we are honest as women and admit we are struggling!

It’s been about a week and a half since I have posted a post. Totally not like me! I made a promise to y’all here that I am going to be honest with you, so here is why.

I have been struggling lately! And I don’t have it all together! And I am nowhere near perfect!

I’ve been so embarrassed I’ve even stayed off social media! I haven’t posted personal posts in awhile.

So why am I struggling you ask? For so many reasons!

I’ve been open about my struggles since my oldest went off to college. I can’t seem to find my footing with her not here. I try each day to find a new normal, and then something happens and I miss her even more. Our daily Facetime and texts are sometimes the highlight of my day and will never give that up. I plan on writing more about my struggles in the future on this blog.

I still have two amazing kids at home who keep me super busy! When I’m missing my oldest I then feel the mommy guilt because I feel like I should be giving 100% to the other two, that they deserve everything!

My husband works all the time. The stress as a fire wife is real! Our husbands are proud men, they love their job(s), but it leaves the majority of the parenting and housework and running the family to us. It is a very stressful life, that we often don’t share with others.

Stepping back and realizing truths

I’m starting to realize that after being a mother for 19 straight years, I really can’t define myself as anything else. It’s come to my attention that without my kids, I don’t have much else of a life. This can depress even the cheeriest of people!

I’ve talked before about the relationship between my oldest and I, but if you are new here, she’s my best friend. Watched Gilmore Girls? That’s us to a tee. I have found myself lonely a lot lately. With my husband at work, my oldest at college, my other daughter being a typical teen (locked up in her room) and my son being a social butterfly; that leaves me, well alone! It goes back to the previous post, 19 years of straight motherhood, I am now lonely!

Realizing you need help

Each week I send out an email to my subscribers, the amazing Simplests I like to call them! In those emails, I give them a positive quote for each day of the week. I’ve gotten some great feedback about how they really help, some look forward to Sunday evenings just to read the quotes. I love doing them. And lately, they have been more so for me!

We as moms are not perfect people. We juggle so much in our daily lives. But social media and even television shows make us feel like we can’t admit when we are struggling. We have to plaster all over how amazing our lives are, how great our kids are, and the positive, happy moods we are in all day every day.

I have found these past few weeks that I can be grateful and moody. I can love my kids and yell at them because I’m stressed. I can smile and cry myself to sleep all at the same time.

Let’s normalize imperfection

I want to spread the message that it’s normal to not be perfect. It’s ok to be stressed out, sad and upset and admit you are a struggling mom. It doesn’t make you any less of a woman or mother. It makes you a better one, one who can admit that life is just hard and you need a time out; that you are a struggling mom.

I recently wrote a post about having a grateful heart. The reason for the post started because I was having a bad day. I realized I needed to step away and regroup before my bad day turned into a terrible day. It’s important to understand, you can have those bad days, and the best way to begin to turn them around is finding all the things you are grateful for!

Let’s make it normal to admit we are struggling moms

I love my life; I love my kids and my husband; I have amazing support systems of friends who love me. But I’m aloud to have those bad days. I push myself so hard to be the perfect mom to my kids, to have the clean house, and the understood “have it all together” woman. Those stresses that I let society put on me have made life harder then it already is.

This year I am working towards being my best self. It’s going to be a long process, that I have admitted. But I’m starting to realize that I need to focus on me and shut out all the distractions around me. I need to hush the cries of perfection, the pressures of motherhood and the demands of women in our society. I need to make myself happy! And the things that make me happy won’t be the same that make you happy, so do this for yourself too! My kids know I love them, that I will never doubt. But they also know they stress me out as well. And when those times come, I need to let myself walk away, text a friend and go out for drinks, because that’s ok too!

Let’s get through this together

I promise to post more, I feel like we women all struggle with life, and too embarrassed to share it. I want to be your support system, I want you to know you are not alone! And the next time you scream at your kids (or throw a cup in their direction, I may or may not have done the other day!) it’s ok! Message me on Instagram, cause I got ya girl! Let’s spread the message that it’s ok to be a struggling mom and not perfect goddesses!

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