We, as adults and parents, these days tend to complain about these teens. You know, the ones with the phones in their hands all the time, always posting to social media. Who have no idea about talking on the phone but always texting and now face-timing their friends. It’s a world we as parents will never understand, but have to figure it out so we can parent it! But I’m here to tell you something I figured out this past week.
I have 2 teenage girls. My oldest just turned 18, a senior in high school. She’s the one who has introduced us to this new parenting life of texting and social media. Then we have a tween, soon to be full fledged teen in a few weeks. She too is on social media, loves to text her friends and be on her device all the time (she does not have a phone but an iPod because in our house they don’t get phones until high school, yes strict but that’s who we are!).
I watch my girls take these silly photos all day long. They aren’t the prettiest, sometimes filtered sometimes not, but sometimes just downright not the most pleasant! I’ve been stuck in some of these photos, thinking oh my what in the world are you doing with that photo?!? I look so fat, or tired, or old! My girls tell me all the time, oh mom!
I was a competitive gymnast and dancer growing up. I was always worried about weight, body image and how I looked. In high school and college I was a cheerleader, make my image problems even worse. I had to be the smallest flyer around. That was my thinking. As an adult I have continued to have body image concerns, so bad sometimes my husband takes the scale and hides it. I try hard to get over it. I have, however, never let my girls act like me! I know totally hypocritical, but that’s good parenting, right?! My girls have great self image and confidence, that’s a parenting win and I will take it!
So this last week, I watched my girls again taking crazy silly pictures of themselves. I watched them post them on Snapchat and not care. And I thought to myself wow, what confidence in themselves! They are confident in who they are, not caring what others say about them. I want to be like them!
I find myself worried about how I act, how I’m dressed, how I’m portrayed on social media all too often. I, however, have raised my girls to be these amazingly confident women who are proud of themselves and not afraid to share it with the world. I am going to start doing as I say from now on! No makeup, I don’t care! Crazy third day hair, who cares! The world needs to know me! The loyal, loving, football loving, obsessed with my husband, love my kids, Netflix watching, God loving me!! I don’t wear makeup everyday, I don’t look nice everyday, some days I so tired my bed is all I want and the world needs to see me then too! Who cares what comments I get, because if you are my true friend, shouldn’t you love me, all of me?!
Before we go about complaining about these teens and their obsession with selfies, those duck lips (I can’t get with that one, sorry), outfit of the day, silly selfies; think about them sharing their genuine self with everyone on their friends list! They are sharing their genuine, silly, fun, loving self with everyone they know and not afraid to do it!
So, here’s my warning to all my friends! Let’s take those silly selfies! Girls night out, yep, selfie time! Basketball practice, yep selfie time. Church meeting, oh yeah selfie time! Feeling silly, oh selfie time! The world is about to get my true genuine self. And all those negative comments, well that’s an easy answer, unfriend! I want my girls to see me for me, someone who is happy with who God created, someone who wants to share it with the world. I want them to follow my actions and not just my words.
Thank you to my teen girls and the lesson I have learned from you. I feel there will be more to learn from you as your generation begins to navigate this amazing world better then we can! They have learned to be themselves and not change for anyone! Strong parenting, maybe so, but now I am going to take my own advice and be my own person, not someone everyone else wants or expects me to be.
Moms, join me! Post those photos, be you and be happy! Choose the friends wisely, clean up those lists with people who love you for you, who don’t expect you to be someone else. And the next time we are together, Selfie time!! #mygenuineself #thisisme
