You know one thing I love about social media, those memories! I faithfully check both Timehop and FB memories every day (yes, sometimes there are differences!). I love the adorable photos of my little ones, hate the way we wrote third person status’ 10 years ago, and love seeing how long I have been friends with someone.

But I digress, that’s not good in the first paragraph of a post! Today I was reminded of a post I put on my business page two years ago. A little background before I share the message. At the time I was subbing full time at the high school. We decided to try this out, to see if it was time for me to go back to work full time. I got up every morning and got myself ready, packed lunches for everyone and went to work. My amazing mom came over every morning to get my youngest up and ready and off to school. After work, I still did school pickups, extracurricular activities, and church meetings.

My truth bomb post

Long truth post: last week was awful! Ever have one of those days where you just feel like a failure? And the worse ones are the mom fails! As I continue to work outside of the house as a long term sub, I’m still stressing over life. I missed my son’s awards ceremony, the first one I ever missed, I totally forgot to take my daughter to her orthodontist appoint and my oldest was mad because I had to go to church and not take her to an event. It all resulted in a bunch of tears from me.

Here’s my question for you, why do we as moms use such a harsh word when describing ourselves? We haven’t failed. Failure is such a hard word. But it’s the first one that pops out of our mouths when describing ourselves on a bad day. We are only human, and with that comes mistakes. I’m still learning to juggle all the tasks as a mom. 17 years and I learn each and every day.

There will be moments of mistakes, unhappiness, and questioning and that’s ok. But, failure, no! All of us are aloud bad days. The laundry ma not of gotten done, dishes may still be piled up, cereal for dinner, late (or missed) practices or appointments. But my kids are alive and I have hugged them, told them I love them and tucked them into bed! To me, that’s a successful day! Tomorrow I will try again because that’s all God asks for, our best, and sometimes our best is just that!

So all you moms out there, let’s ban the word failure from our mom vocabulary, forget the hard days and remember the good life!! #truth #badday #goodlife #momlife #momfail #tryagaintomorrow

Our struggles are real

Last week I wrote a post, here, about how I was struggling, more so emotionally as a mom. But what I realized with that post and this post, is that a lot of our emotional struggles come from being physically pushed to our limits as a human.

As moms, we are tasked with calendar planning and keeping, housework, running the kids around, homework help, nursing sick ones, etc (you get the jest). If you are lucky to have a significant other who helps with some of the tasks, yay you! But let’s be honest, most moms one the ones in charge of all this.

In addition, some of us work outside the home. So add in all the stress of work on top of that. That’s a lot that one person is responsible to keep straight, to do and to think about. Oh, and let’s not forget about not only taking care of everyone else but also ourselves (you know so we don’t go crazy, #selfcare).

So then what happens when we can’t keep up with it all? Cause no one can keep up with everything! At some point, you have to say no to things or you just break. And when those times come, we tend to be judged. That’s when we tend to get the looks from others, you know what I’m talking about, the side sympathy look. The comments from others, “I’m always here to help” “just call and I can give you a hand” but we never do. Our mental health is not one we talk about often, but it’s important! Check this post out, it’s a very open and honest post.

No more failures and breakdowns

And it’s not just others who judge, it’s ourselves. We are so harsh on ourselves. We use words like fail and breakdown. But why? We are tasked with superhuman duties, and if we can’t do or fulfill them we fail? Superman doesn’t save everyone and every building!

Isn’t our real daily task to just keep the tiny humans we call our kids alive? And everything else that we do during the day is a bonus. Sandwiches and cereal are meals; dinner from scratch is a bonus.

We need to get this whole thinking of mom failure out. Let’s stop piling more and more onto our daily tasks. Join me in stepping back and enjoying our lives as moms.

My kids, your kids, all our kids aren’t going to remember that we missed one orthodontist appointment out of 30. They aren’t going to remember us not taking them to one practice out of hundreds. Missing one awards ceremony in first grade is nothing when we are the loudest clappers at their high school graduation. Our time with our kids is not about quantity but quality.

Selfcare both mentally and physically

It’s times we moms stop thinking negatively of ourselves. We need to, as a whole, support each other and ourselves. Let’s begin praising ourselves and others on our small AND large accomplishments. Let’s stop stressing over the mistakes because we are humans and we are supposed to make mistakes. Forgive ourselves and move on, without regrets and stress. I talk more about this here, less mommy guilt and more gratitude.

Let’s begin to take care of ourselves. Starting mentally, taking away the culture of overdoing each day. Worrying more on spending quality time with our kids then quantity. And then less take some more time for ourselves, resting and relaxing and destressing (here are simple ways for a busy mom). Because when we are feeling good about ourselves, we feel good about everything.

No more failing, just a winning mom

Let’s start a movement on social media of posting about our love of being a mom! No more posts about our failures to make others feel ok about theirs. I want to share about all the joys, and not to fluff up my social media, but because I’m proud of being a mom. And when I do miss an appointment or practice or game or awards ceremony; I’ll post about it but with no hashtag momfail, but to just say its momlife!

I love my kids and I love my life. I don’t want to be remembered as the stressed-out mom, who was always upset with herself. My kids will remember me for loving them, for having fun with them and for doing my best every day. No more failing here, just a winning mom!

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